I am more for a “common sense approach” when it comes to relationships of any kind. The purpose of couple’s struggles is to help those that feel they have reached the end of their rope in their relationships. This site is not a guide or a template for your marriage. Couple’s struggles is simply my take on how I would, or how I have dealt with situations that come in a relationship.
Let’s face it, fairy tales only happen in story books and happily ever after doesn’t happen without two people wanting it together. Let me start out by saying that I am not a professional therapist and the only counseling experience that I have are with family, friends, past relationships and coworkers. While I may not have a degree in psychology, I certainly have my share of life experience.
Love and a happy marriage
Most of the world would agree that this is one of the most important assets that one could hope for in life. Loving spouse, perfect children, financially stable and a drama free life. Haha, yeah right; Me too! The fact of the matter is that life is not perfect, you can’t just coast along and hope for the best. Life is good at throwing curve balls, and we have to know when to swing, when to step out of the box and when to take a hit for the team.
In a world so flooded with temptation, it is imperative that we maintain faith in our marriages. Social media and dating sites make it so easy to commit adultery in the age we live in. Our biggest vulnerabilities as humans is giving into temptation when we are weak, and the devil knows this. Don’t give into the devil.
Fight for the love of your family and everything built on it. If the foundation of your love is cracked, then it must be repaired. Be strong and don’t lose sight of what you committed as we only live once. If your love is strong, then nothing can kill it.
Compromise is key
I challenge the person who claims that they have maintained any type of long-term relationship without practicing any give and take or meeting in the middle when necessary.
A one-sided relationship is like going the wrong way down a one-way street. You might be in the clear for a short distance, but eventually you are going to be faced with a major problem head on and be forced to stop, swerve or just keep pressing forward to see what happens.
I would not recommend the third choice. A healthy relationship must travel down a two-way street in order to keep both lanes traveling in a safe direction.
Children can be exhausting
Newborns and toddlers especially. You walk through the door after a long day at work and the babysitter is lunging for the door. Leaving a broken record that keeps playing “dad” or “mom” to the point that you want to change that title at times.
But the fact is, children don’t know any different. They don’t understand what deadlines and commitments are and they don’t understand where money comes from. They’ve never shook hands with stress, and they certainly don’t understand why mommy and daddy argue sometimes. The only thing they know is that are happy to see their parents at the end of the day.
Money
Money is labeled as the root of all evil, while that may be true, we need money to survive. If you are fortunate enough to find yourself in a relationship in which only one of you has to provide an income to support the family, that’s great. That is not the reality for most couples in this day and age.
48% of couples argue over money and finances, while that doesn’t top the charts, it still comes in firmly at the top three. Money certainly doesn’t buy happiness, that is a fact. I personally know of a few couples that are very “financially comfortable” and they absolutely cringe at the mere sight of each other. While we all have to make a living, I would never sacrifice happiness and put on a fake smile everyday just to live life as we only have one life to live.
Sex, what’s that?
Look, sex is natural, it has been happening since the beginning of time and it is as real as me writing this and you reading it. If our parents never had sex, neither of those occurrences would be happening right now. In the beginning, two people in love can’t get enough of it. Over time however, life happens.
Kids and careers can dim even the brightest flame. Sex is one of the most important aspects of any relationship, it is what you’ve built your life around, the physical attraction is what brought you together to begin with.
Making time for each other
Careers, deadlines, children and commitments. Family life can get downright crazy at times. As hectic as life tends to get, it is important to not lose spark in your relationship. Among sports practices, jobs, homework and bills to pay, there has to be “us” time. Make sure that you don’t lose light of the reason that you fell in love with each other.
It is healthy to schedule at least a couple of date nights a month with just the two of you. Catch a movie and dinner or go hang out with friends, hell, go fishing if that is something you both love! You have to set aside time for your marriage. You don’t have to spend a fortune, just spend the time.
The objective of couple’s struggles
We all need a lifeline to resort to at times. Whether you’ve been married for fifty years or are in a brand-new relationship, situations may arrive, and you need someone “outside the box” for reference.
Couples struggles is meant to help couples from all walks of life through their journey together in this cruel and unforgiving world. Sometimes an outside source can provide an “aha moment” that one couldn’t recognize through the endless fog otherwise.
We all have our quirks and sometimes hindsight isn’t always 20/20. I am not claiming to be an expert by any means, but I think if you give my posts some of your undivided attention, you will most certainly find yourself intrigued by my views.